Gratitude for My Cancer

This is probably my most favorite quote. Of all time. Just sayin' ;).

The day before I was diagnosed with Melanoma (the deadliest type of skin cancer, for those of you who are unfamiliar with this ugly disease) I specifically remember what I did before I went to bed. 

CONFESSION TIME:
I have always struggled with praying every morning and every night. I'll make a good habit and then lose it after a couple of months. I'm human :). 

I'll pray at night, but forget to in the morning. Or, I'll be too lazy or too cold to get out of my bed to kneel down so i'll just say a quick prayer while I'm falling asleep. And sometimes, when I am brave enough to get out of my warm bed, I will fall asleep on my knees, waking up 30 minutes later, with a huge red mark on my forehead from leaning on my bed ;).  

At that time in my life I had a great habit of saying my prayers and that night I was excited to talk to my God to thank Him for my blessings. Not for anything in particular, just for everything I had. I didn't have much, but I had what I needed. I had my family, I had my faith and I had a testimony that I was loved by Him. 

But in past prayers, I had overlooked one little thing. I hadn't thanked the Lord, in a very long time, for my healthy body. And that night, I remembered to say thank you for my beautiful, healthy body. I remember feeling so blessed for the temple I had been given. To know that at that moment: I could walk. I could take care of myself without the aid of another. I could do so many things with my body, with my mind, that many people cannot do. And I was SO grateful for that. 

I felt blessed.




The next day...


At around 2:15 pm on June 15 I got the call that changed my life. "You have Melanoma."

Shock ensued. Grief pierced my heart. Fear shook through my whole body. 


It wasn't until the end of the day that I remembered my prayer. My inconsequential prayer that I had gratefully sang to my Lord. The prayer that included my gratitude for my healthy body. I laughed at the irony. But, I wasn't angry. I wasn't hurt. I just didn't understand. Why?

Now fast forward to today. Thanksgiving 2013!!! The day where we Americans give thanks for our ancestors safe passage to the Americas and we give thanks for what we have today. The day where my big, crazy loving family gets together and EATS and plays music and gives thanks to our Lord. The day where we get together and ask how we're all doing. The day where all the relatives I haven't seen in months ask me about my cancer and say,"How are you doing???" 

The day where all of those emotions from that journey came souring back. The day where I remembered that prayer, said so long ago, in a humble, cramped apartment bedroom, by a little girl who was just so grateful for a healthy body. 

The day I realized why I said that prayer, why I needed that prayer and why I am so grateful I said that prayer. 

I said that prayer because, well, I was grateful. I felt blessed to have a body that was healthy and beautiful. But, the next day I found out I had cancer. Why did I have cancer when I JUST said thank you to my God for a healthy body!? 

I don't know why I had cancer. I could say that God was punishing me for not being grateful for a healthy body. Gosh, I could blame it on the Sun. But, at the end of the day, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because I don't care. I don't need to know why I was chosen to have cancer. I am just glad I was able to experience that trial because I learned how to have even more gratitude. I didn't feel bitter after my diagnosis. I didn't feel a hardening of my heart towards God. I felt the opposite.

I saw this picture on Facebook. I'm not sure who it belongs to... But I really appreciated the quote, nonetheless :).

I felt grateful that my body had been healthy. I felt grateful that with the help of surgeons with blessed hands, kind nurses who would always smile, a family with such a positive attitude and a Lord that never stopped loving me that I COULD GET THROUGH ANYTHING. 

There was always a silver lining. There is always a silver lining. 

"There is always, always, always something to be grateful for."

I am glad I said that prayer because the next day I could still be grateful. That prayer reminded me that there is always something to be grateful for. No matter what our situation in life, there is always a silver lining. 

And with a prayer of gratitude in our hearts, we can get through anything. We can be grateful for anything, even if we are going through a trial. The most grateful people are the happiest people. 

I am a stronger woman because of this trial. And I am a stronger woman because I decided to kneel down, bow my head and just say,"Thank you."


I am grateful for my trial with cancer. 

"Hard times will always be there.

But so will Christ."
-Al Fox —

Never, forget to smile. 

Beauty in a thing called Indian Food!

Ok... I know I promised you all positive and uplifting posts. And this is! I promise :). 

I have a question for you...


Have you ever eaten something so divine, you couldn't stop? 

Well I have!

It's called Indian food. Curry, masala, you name it. IT'S DIVINE! And I know where you can get this divine experience. 

Bombay House! The servers and the hosts are so wonderful and they treat you like you are a V.I.P. guest (literally, if you even take a sip from your water cup, it's like you pushed the alarm button and someone comes running back to your table to fill up your cup. It's. Insane.). 

The food is amazing. I'm drooling just thinking about the deliciousness... 

It fills you up so quickly, you know you're going to have leftovers for breakfast ;).

And no, I am not being paid to advertise them. For the love, I just started this blog. Do you think I have sponsors!?

But, before my taste buds enjoyed this heavenly spread of shrimp coconut curry and angel sent garlic na'an bread, I was listening to some amazing people speak. 

Where? Oh, just this little broadcast for a little church called the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Or, the Mormons. LDS folks. Ya know, Joseph Smith and his bunch o' pioneers :).

Yeah, us. We're still around, and going strong. And we like to meet up, now and then to talk about stuff. Religion, God, how we can better ourselves, and how we are freaking awesome! 

It's a great pick-me-upper. I highly recommend watching if you are feeling a little down ;). 

http://www.lds.org/broadcasts/watch/general-relief-society-meeting/2013/09?lang=eng&vid=2703169989001 


Anyways, this little broadcast was for the women of the church. Women, ONLY. It was great! We got to get all cute and dressed up, meet up with a bunch of our other friends and listen to some amazing speakers (and of course, there was dessert afterwards. It's not a Mormon function without food). 


Joking aside:

The messages spoken last night were messages that all need to hear. I won't go into great detail because if you haven't already heard it, you need to hear it for yourself. I can't give you the feeling that was felt there. And I know you'll say that you don't "have time" to read or watch it. For this, you do. 

http://www.lds.org/broadcasts/watch/general-relief-society-meeting/2013/09?lang=eng&vid=2703169989001

You need to hear that you are LOVED. That you are cared for by a man who isn't a man; He is our Father. You need to hear that even if you run away from what you believe, whatever religion you belong to, He will look for you and want you to come back to the fold. You need to know that He has never, and will never leave you alone.

A little deep? You can stop reading now, but I am not even close to finishing.

YOU need to know that being offended is,"ridiculous!" (sorry, I didn't say this, just quoting!) You need to hear that He wants you to be happy. (did I just say happy??) Yes, I did! And I will say it again. You need to hear that HE WANTS YOU TO BE HAPPY!!! Not just temporal happiness, not worldly happiness. But true, eternal happiness. 

You need to remember. Remember to believe. Believe in Him and everything will work out according to His plan. His plan doesn't always follow your plan, but His plan will never fail you. I promise. 



I do not say these things blindly. I believe every single thing I have written down. I know, without a doubt, that He loves you. And so does this man, Thomas Monson. 

"Your Heavenly Father loves you, 

each of you. 

That never changes. 

It is simply there."

-President Thomas S. Monson 

Obviously we loved the Bombay experience and would definitely go again.

And we loved the experience we had last night as we listened to those great, amazing speakers giving us some great tips to survive life.

My plate of shrimp coconut curry wasn't the only thing that filled me up last night. And if you want to know just what I am talking about, click here to find out:

http://www.lds.org/?lang=eng

Because this, is a beautiful thing :). 

Why in heaven's name am I writing a blog!?

That, is a great question! I am not a fluent writer; I don't even keep a journal very well. I will read someone else's blog and then go on for an hour critiquing how awful the spelling was, how the author just went on and on with their vendetta... and now I have the gall to write my own blog???

I'm not writing a blog to tell you all of my faults. I'm not writing a blog to tell you about the new trends, or show you the new styles coming off of Paris' runways. 

I'm writing a blog because I am tired. I am tired of reading the news, or surfing the web and only seeing negative, degrading articles!!!!! 

I'm tired of seeing demoralizing, vulgar and desensitizing movies, plays, videos, etc. I'm tired. I am so, so tired. 

I want to see GOOD. I want people to come to a page where they KNOW there will always be something positive and something UPLIFTING to read! I know that there is good in the world. I know it! I know that I am not the only one who is tired of turning on the TV and then having to turn it right back off because the only thing on is just... junk.

So, I promise that this blog, "A Beauty of a Thing," will have just that. Positive, uplifting, beautiful things. I may not spell things right, my punctuation may be awful (I can just hear my editing major friends howling with pain at the sight of it all) and I may not say everything you want to hear. But I will try to bring beauty back to the Internet. That, I promise to you, dear reader. 

So! Pull up your computer chair, snuggle in your fluffy blanket, and get ready for some positive BEAUTIFUL articles. 

Now that, is a beautiful thing :).